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The Original Belief in Separation
I proceeded with the lessons and arrived at the first review with the
objects in the world sometimes looking as if they had only a front side
and around them and from behind glimmered light. This
During a meditation somewhere in the review I felt as if falling. Not falling down, but forward. I knew what was happening and at that point the ego freaked out and fear welled up that I had not experienced since childhood. At that point I fell away from the Course for a while until now, as I am beginning the lessons again.
Here is my question that has been haunting me. The Holy Spirit is quiet when asked. God being perfect means His Creations are perfect. How then could His Creations begin to create imperfectly to cause the separation? I know the separation was healed in an instant and what I am experiencing now is only a memory if it. But how could the separation have happened at all?
Blessings and love from a holy rolling stone trying to find his way back home.
A: Beloved One
The spiritual journey is the pathway inward, the undoing of every scrap of belief that stems from this core belief. You have had glimpses of the "light behind the veil" and this is very encouraging.
The ego is terrified of the surrender and when the mind is identified with it, you experience its feelings. The ego is terrified of the Light and of the spiritual journey because it is the belief in separation, and it is being undone.
I am glad you are turning back to the Course; we are deeply joined
in our holy shared purpose of awakening to truth. It is a pathway through
the darkness to the light, so the fear will come up, along
The mind, in the full awareness of the Atonement, knows that the separation never happened. The full awareness of the Atonement is that the separation never happened.
I always hear the same questions, "How did the impossible occur?" "To whom did the impossible occur?"
I call them the top questions. How did this happen in the first place? How could perfection, how could God, ever make a mistake? Or how could Christ, who is a perfect Being, ever make a mistake?
And basically, it is a statement. When you ask the questions, "How did the impossible occur?" or "How did this happen in the first place?" there is an assumption underneath the questions. And what is that assumption?
That it happened! Of course the ego likes that assumption. Then it can ask all kind of questions including how this happened.
It is like you are on a wild goose chase to find the right theology, the right teacher, the right technique, the right mantra. Oh my gosh, the guilt at trying to solve that question. But the very assumption is something we have to learn to release.
There will be no theology that will come along to get you out of this. There isn't going to be a concept. There will be an experience that will come that will end your doubting. In the Course that experience is the Atonement. The Atonement is full awareness that the separation never happened.
In this respect, A Course in Miracles is a launching pad. You are on a launching pad where you are ready to take off in a rocket and get up in orbit where you have no sense of gravity. You are happy and free. A Course in Miracles is a book that is just designed to help you get up into orbit, into Being-ness, into your perfection.
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